Thursday, May 23, 2013
Why haven’t you arrested any of these [banker] guys? Is it because they didn’t buy weed? And if they didn’t, let me tell you, it’s because they blew all their money on COCAINE! Jon Stewart
Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Some members of the press have called Bassem Youssef “an Egyptian Jon Stewart.” Let’s be real, Jon Stewart is “an American Bassem Youssef.”

This badass is a fucking CARDIAC SURGEON, but that level of awesome wasn’t enough, so he became a satirist with his own show “The Program” (in the vein of The Daily Show). He was recently named one of Time’s 100 most influential people for 2013.

And he’s sexy as fuck.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

The Daily Show just went there.

Justice Roberts: Is it your insinuation that the south is more racist than the north?

Jon Stewart: No, we’ve been to Boston.

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Wednesday, January 30, 2013
The arc of history is long, and it tends toward shamelessness. Jon Stewart
Monday, January 14, 2013

Were you guys aware that Jessica Williams (THE BEST CORRESPONDENT ON THE DAILY SHOW) is on Tumblr? Because she totally is.

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Tuesday, January 8, 2013
“So the principal with a gun is supposed to stop the intruder with a bullet proof vest and an assault rifle? You know, I don’t think Mr. Belding is as badass as you think he is.” - Jon Stewart

So the principal with a gun is supposed to stop the intruder with a bullet proof vest and an assault rifle? You know, I don’t think Mr. Belding is as badass as you think he is.” - Jon Stewart

So the principal with a gun is supposed to stop the intruder with a bullet proof vest and an assault rifle? You know, I don’t think Mr. Belding is as badass as you think he is. Jon Stewart

(Source: seriouslyamerica)

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Wyatt Cenac is leaving The Daily Show and I AM SO SAD

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(Source: seriouslyamerica)

Friday, December 7, 2012
  • Jon Stewart: Would you leave it up the the free market, what happens to New Jersey after Hurricane Sandy?
  • Chris Christie: That's a ridiculous question.
  • Jon Stewart: But would you leave it up to the free market what happens to someone uninsured who has cancer?
  • Chris Christie: People in this country understand that when a natural disaster happens anywhere in this country, we need to stand up and support each other.
  • Jon Stewart: And what I'm saying, is that healthcare in this country IS a natural disaster.
Here’s where I part from the republican party in an enormous way: if you have cancer, and you don’t have health insurance, that’s Hurricane Sandy. Jon Stewart, to NJ Governor Chris Christie, in The Daily Show

(Source: seriouslyamerica)