[TW: Rape] Better late than never? Public spotlight on rape in the US military
…something which most people don’t want to admit many men feel: that they have the right to be sexually titillated or at least aesthetically pleased, by the sight of women.
Not by women in their bedrooms, or on a date, or at a party; just by women in general, walking down the street, shopping, working, going about their daily business. Women men don’t know, have never had any dealings with and have no relevance to their lives, have no right to be out in public, unless they are making an effort to look as if they care if men want to fuck them or not. If they’re not prepared to make themselves sexually attractive to men, they they don’t really have the right to be out in the world. They should either stay at home or wear a burka, so that men’s aesthetic sensibilities are not offended. Looking as if they don’t actually care if they please men or not, is enough to be considered as a declaration of hostility by men like Demetri Marchessini. The idea that we should have dressed to please ourselves, to go about our business comfortably, rather than to have prioritised being aesthetically or sexually pleasing to men, is a terribly worrying one for men like this.
Marchessini is idiotic enough to have expressed that worry out loud in public; but there are many more men out there, who at the back of their mind have the same assumptions but just don’t express them out loud because they suspect they’d be laughed at as loudly as Marchessini has been. While it’s fun to laugh at them, it’s worth examining why they are worried; if women are comfortable and happy in their own skins and aren’t trying to please men, then that means that men can’t enjoy the power kick of being constantly reminded that women’s essential role is to be there to please them and be used by them. That’s what lies at the heart of this hostile trousers nonsense.
I won’t even begin to compare the way men express hostility to women, compared with how Marchessini et al think women express hostility to men; men’s hostility to women goes way beyond wearing the wrong trousers; in public, men catcall, harass and insult women; those women who dress without reference to pleasing men will be instructed by male acquaintances to put some make up on or cover their grey hairs and advised by men they don’t know that they are munters if they don’t; those who do dress to comply with patriarchal beauty standards will be advised that they have nice tits, or a fat arse or that they need to be fucked slowly for 12 hours or any of the other myriad threatening remarks men seem to be able to pick out of their bag without thinking. They’ll rape or sexually assault a quarter of us at some point in our lifetime; and they kill 2 women a week in the UK.
If only men could take a leaf out of women’s book and express hostility to the opposite sex by wearing clothes women find unattractive, instead of insulting us, harassing us, raping us, beating us or killing us. How much more pleasant and safe the world would be for women. Source: How to be hostile for men and women (via zeeblebum)
FACT: There is no way a child can stop an adult from doing what he or she wants with her.
MYTH: All the child had to do to stop it was tell someone.
FACT: A child is too afraid to tell.
MYTH: All the child had to do was run away.
FACT: There was no place to go. Beverly Engel, The Right to Innocence, Healing the Trauma of Childhood Sexual Abuse (via heydoodlehey)
nonatno asked: TW: SEXUAL ASSAULT, RAPE I'm tired of people talking about how going to prison ruins rapists lives. It's like a. what about the survivor's life? Does that mean nothing to you? and b. maybe if they hadn't you know, raped someone, this impending possible prison sentence wouldn't be a problem. Also, thank you for posting those statistics of how often rapists actually make it to prison.
We are 100% on the same page. And thank YOU for putting a trigger warning at the beginning of your ask!
feminism-is-retarded asked: No human being deserves to have their lives ruined. Man or woman. Criminal or not. Doesn’t matter. Rape is a bad thing, no doubt. However theres a reason why america has a justice system: INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY IN A COURT OF LAW! Besides, once a criminal has served a sentence, there is still room for them to IMPROVE as people, and to not repeat their vile actions! But “ruining” their lives does nobody any good. Justice is in the hands of trained officials, and NOT angry feminists like you.
Oh hey, someone with an ableist slur in their URL wants to talk to me about decency. Honey, you are wayyy over your head - you clearly know nothing about rape culture, or, you know, the way 97 percent of rapists will never spend a single day in jail.
Educate yourself - and don’t come back here, you’re getting ignored (I don’t need casual ableism and rape apology on my dash or in my ask box, thanks all the same).
EDIT: Also, LOL at the idea that there aren’t any angry feminists in the justice system.
[TW: rape threats, rape culture]
People in my ask threatening rape and/or being rape apologists: just give it up. I’m not going to answer you. You’re getting blocked and reported. Don’t you have anything better to do with your time?
oceans-separate-us asked: I know what it feels like to be raped. Most. thankfully, don't. But I agree, something very horrible should happen to rapists. You don't deserve threats. No one does.
I’m so sorry that happened to you.
I, thankfully, do not know what it feels like to be raped. Sadly, the vast majority of my female friends and family members (and more than a few of my male friends) do. Rape is a disgusting, horrible thing, and rape threats are triggering to a lot of people - I’m so sorry if anyone has been triggered by all these posts (I’m tagging them “tw: rape” and “rape culture” if anyone wants to blacklist).
brickjolras asked: tO THE BARRICADES WE CANNOT HAVE THESE SHENANIGANS YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO BE RAPED W OW STUPID PEOPLE
Obviously, no one deserves to be raped.