I am a victim of sexual assault, but I am NOT:
- A Rolex watch or a fancy car in a bad neighborhood. I am not the basis for a ridiculous victim-blaming metaphor based on theft. I am a person, not an object.
- Your sister or daughter or wife. I exist independently of my relationships with and importance to men. It is not wrong that I was sexually assaulted because I am someone’s daughter. It’s wrong because I am a human being.
- To blame. I didn’t ask for this. I didn’t want it. It doesn’t matter what I wore or if I was intoxicated or if I flirted. I never wanted this. No one ever would.
- A punchline. Rape is not a joke. Rape is not funny. If you think it is funny, it’s probably because you’re a rapist.
- Impure. I am not worthless or dirty or sullied. The person who did this to me is.
- An opportunity to play devil’s advocate. The devil has enough advocates. They’re called 90% of our society, and they’ve already said every single thing your puny, unimaginative brain could possibly think of.
- Going to be silenced. Not by my abuser, and not by you or anyone else.
mafattiee asked: not only is optimistic-pokemon-trainer a misogynistic rape-apologist mra asshat, he also fetishizes asian women. "Things I reblog: Hot Asian Women." further proof that this guys is a total loser/creep. i'm sorry for what he said to you and i completely support your original post!! rapists do deserve to have their lives ruined, and your commentary when that guy talked about false rape accusations was admirable.
Thank you.
optimistic-pokemon-trainer is an enormous douchecanoe.
[TW: RAPE] Torrington teens sentenced to 4 months in prison in 2011 rape case
SERIOUS TRIGGER WARNING FOR DESCRIPTION OF RAPE:
Two Torrington teens accused of gang-raping an intoxicated, unconscious 13-year-old girl in 2011 were each sentenced to five years in prison, suspended after four months served, on Friday afternoon.
Dylan Rodriguez, 16, and Kenuel Weaver-Hunte, 17, faced a possible nine months in prison after pleading guilty earlier this year to risk of injury to a minor with illicit sexual contact, a Class D felony. Rodriguez and Weaver-Hunte will also be on probation for five years after they are released from prison. They were both originally charged with second-degree sexual assault as juveniles, but the cases were later moved to the adult docket.
A third teen, Alec Berkemeier, 16, of Winsted, has pleaded not guilty to second-degree sexual assault and risk of injury to a minor. Those charges are still pending.…
The incident occurred the night of July 23, 2011 at Weaver-Hunte’s aunt’s house in Torrington. Rodriguez, Weaver-Hunte and allegedly Berkemeier provided the victim with alcohol, including vodka-laced Kool-Aid, before stripping off her clothes after she passed out and then sequentially raping her while she was unconscious.
When the victim’s mother texted at 10:19 p.m., saying she would call police if her daughter was not home soon, the defendants told police they panicked. When the victim woke up, and asked, “What happened?,” Weaver-Hunte replied that they’d gone to the carnival and she’d passed out.
One of the girl’s alleged assailants walked her to Culvert Street, where her mother picked her up. She’d begun driving, looking for her daughter, she told police.
The victim then reported the sexual assault to her mother and police.
For some reason, I haven’t seen this ANYWHERE - spread it like wildfire. Thanks to angel-cake for the heads-up.
TW: RAPE CULTURE
Ahh, Halifax. My hometown.
A protest was held today in support of Rehtaeh Parsons, the Halifax girl who recently committed suicide after being bullied incessantly due to photos that circulated of her being raped by four boys. You’ve seen it on the news, I’m sure.
It’s a horrible tragedy, and on top of it, a counter-protest was staged today in support of the boys accused of raping her.
Not upsetting enough? Have a look at the Facebook page (Speak The Truth) set up in support of the accused rapists… By a girl.
Don’t believe in rape culture? Read the Facebook group, wherein one guy accuses Rehtaeh of being a coward who killed herself because she “made a drunken mistake.” Yeah. Because being raped is a mistake, like forgetting bus change or picking up the wrong kind of milk. Right?
Wrong. There’s a lot I could say on this topic, but look for yourself…
….
I don’t have any words, just anger and disgust and vomit
You can report this group on Facebook.
Hannah Gadsby on rape culture (x)
Real shit
How to make a joke involving rape
mock rape culture (aka bring awareness), NOT the victim
good stuff
Tw rape
Oratorasaurus: (Yet another) “Teach Men Not To Rape” mantra is bad.
You can spend millions in programs designed to prevent violence, rape, drug sales, gang activity, but they are an eternal presence. Some people do things regardless or have mental issues, it’s unavoidable.
Saying “teach men not to rape” because some men rape, is like telling women not to shoplift because some women shoplift. Or telling black people not to steal because some black people steal. You’re inadvertently creating stereotype threat for men . Simply tell everyone not to rape or sexually assault, cause both sexes are capable , I also say this from a place of personal experience as blackmail can also be very effective for women to get sex without true consent.
So how else do you suggest we end rape? Because teaching people NOT to rape is going to be way more beneficial to society as a whole than teaching women not to get raped. I’m sorry if that hits your delicate white boy feelings.
“Teach men not to rape” is not just because some men rape. It has nothing to do with the percentage of men who rape. It’s because men have the PRIVILEGE TO RAPE AND GET AWAY WITH IT. It’s because society already teaches men to rape.
Also, blaming violence on “mental issues” is ableist.
Putting all other issues of the OP’s terrible post aside, rape should definitely not be blamed on ‘mental issues’. That’s not a symptom of mental illness, it’s merely an ill informed assumption based on the stigma that convinces people that people with mental disabilities are violent. It seems to be much more of an entitlement problem, and as theconcealedweapon said, it’s also an issue of rapists being able to get away with it.
The fact that the majority of rapists are men led to the creation of that stereotype. Don’t blame that shit on “teach men not to rape” because that is bullshit. Blame the men who’re out there raping women and making them unsafe.
#safetytipsforladies: A hashtag about how tired women are of being told to do stupid, ineffective, unrealistic things to avoid being raped.
“try becoming Medusa, or if that is too difficult, a basilisk.”
Not sure if laughing or crying.
Submission: http://www.facebook.com/stan.boss.1“If you cover yourself in steaks and go jogging through Africa and get mauled by a lion”… omfg I can’t even
This guy would probably think that there are lions everywhere in Africa but no public libraries with free wifi.
Lion is embarrassed for you, Stan. Lion thinks you should stop being a rape apologist and learn how to control your dick.
These lionesses would rather you just get eaten, Stan.
Dearest Beloved Girl,This letter is an apology. An apology for being...
Dearest Beloved Girl,
This letter is an apology. An apology for being an adult who has failed to make the world safe for you. Because you should be safe.
Even when you make the sometimes stupid, often naive choices that teens make, you should be safe.Your vulnerability should not invite assault and attack of your body or your spirit. And so I am sorry, because we have failed to teach your male peers that they have no right to touch you without your consent or to use you to meet their needs or to discard you if your victimization does not fit their life plan. I am sorry we have failed you.
This letter is also a note of gratitude for your willingness to report this crime, to take the stand, and to endure the viciousness hurled at you this week. I know the words that run in a loop in your mind. Don’t tell. If you tell, no one will believe you. If you tell, everyone will think you are a whore. Sometimes he is the one who says them first, spewing the words like mold spores that grow in the darkness of your silence. Sometimes it’s your own voice telling you, I can’t tell. No one will believe me. It’s the reason 54%of survivors never report the assault. It’s the reason I kept my secret for nearly a decade. But not you, beloved. You demanded the right to be heard.
You may have lost your voice that night, but you found it again when you told the truth–even though you knew, didn’t you? You knew just how relentlessly they would try to silence you.
You knew that neighbors, and friends, and even members of the national media would mourn the loss of your attackers’ football careers more than the loss of your innocence. You knew that even those who claimed to be sympathetic would pass along the pictures of your assault with a tone deaf voyeurism that seeks to make you a thing instead of a person. I think maybe you knew, or suspected these things, but you spoke out anyway.
And that…that is astonishing. And I want to say thank you, because you did what so many of us never find the strength to do. You spoke for yourself. You spoke for the 44% of rape victims who are under 18–and you spoke for my 14-year-old self, who still hears that threat echoing in my head, “Don’t tell. No one will believe you.”
So, this is my apology and this is my gratitude. This is me saying, “I believe you.”
And I believe you are inherently valuable. Not as a character in some grotesque news cycle where your assault is all we know, but as a girl with hopes and dreams and ambitions and vulnerabilities and so much more growing up to do. I never need to know your name, but I need you to know you are not alone. Surviving is not a single occurrence, it is a lifetime of making choices that honor you and your right to speak. You have begun surviving. You will continue surviving. And if you ever get down, or wonder how you will go on, take out this letter and read it to yourself.
I believe you.
Sincerely,
Melissa
http://tv.msnbc.com/2013/03/23/my-open-letter-to-the-steubenville-survivor/
I didn’t make it through the 2nd paragraph before I was sobbing too hard to breathe.
